Iona Parsons
Sex And The City is a TV show that I will always hold close to my heart, having binged the show with my housemates a couple of years ago. Set in New York City in the late 90s / early 2000s, it follows the chaotic lives of four female friends in their 30s who each navigate the world of romance, relationships and friendship. It touches on the unspoken and what can be seen as rather explicit themes at the time, such as sex, nudity and independence. Recently, however, I would say in the past couple of years, there has been a sudden surge in its popularity. It has come back for round two. But this time with a new, more modern audience.
The show provides us with teachings and life lessons which every young girl and woman can benefit from. It is worth mentioning that although the show provides us with lots of life lessons about modern life, what is lacking in these teachings is diversity, particularly in relation to sexuality and race, meaning that its teachings may not cater for all audiences. (P.S. Don’t read this article if you don’t want to come across spoilers…)
WHILST ROMANTIC LOVE IS DESIRABLE, FRIENDSHIP IS ESSENTIAL AND BELONGS AT THE HEART OF LIFE
Behind the glitz and glamour of New York City, the flashy and fashionable world that radiates fun and sparkle, there are four women with problematic lives which we can all relate to in some way – whether you identify as a Carrie, a Samantha, a Miranda or a Charlotte. At its core, Sex And The City is essentially a show that emphasises the importance of friendship. It is undeniable that there is not a scene where we don’t see these four women spend time together, despite their busy high-flying careers – whether that’s a lunch date, cocktails at a snazzy bar, coffee walks in Central Park, these women are simply inseparable. They share an unbreakable bond and stick together through some of the most harrowing times. Whether that is the death of Miranda’s mum, Charlotte’s pregnancy struggles or Big’s commitment issues. In a world of instability, whether that’s to do with romantic relationships or the hardships of life, these four women can find stability through their friendships. The show teaches us that whilst romantic love is desirable, friendship is essential and belongs at the heart of life. As Charlotte says, ‘Don’t laugh at me, but maybe we could be each other’s soul mates. Then we could let men just be these great, nice guys to have fun with.’
As one can decipher from the title, Sex And The City is a show about sex. Whilst this can feel particularly explicit and intense at times, the show channels the taboo topic of sex into something positive and empowering. We see each character in the show go on their own sexual journey, learning about themselves as the show develops. We are taught as young women to celebrate our sexuality. There are times in the show where we are presented with unglamorous and even comedic sex scenes, giving us a realistic portrayal of sexual encounters, shying away from the glamorised and perfect ones Hollywood provides us with. Samantha is the pioneer of sexual empowerment. She lives her life the way she wants to and is not ashamed about it in the slightest (as she shouldn’t be). Samantha leads a bold and lustful life coloured with sexual experimentation and liberation, teaching us that this is okay.
From season one to six, over a span of 6 years, these women certainly tackle the dating scene and romantic world. We see them go on their fair share of bad dates, experiences of brutal breakups, marriages and even divorce. Sex And The City shows us that this is all part of the process; relationships are complex and messy, you can come back from a bad date, and closure is not always achievable. It strives to show us the imperfections and reality of dating. By the end of the show, each character has their own happy ending.
SEX AND THE CITY TEACHES US THAT IT IS OKAY TO NOT HAVE IT ALL FIGURED OUT OR ‘ TO HAVE IT ALL’
There is something refreshing and comforting about having four women in their 30s who don’t immediately have it all figured out, and each takes on individual and exhausting journeys, but in the end are granted with what they have wished for. An almost life lesson to girls that there is beauty in time. However, Sex And The City also teaches us that whilst finding the one and having that traditional happy ending is definitely not vital and sometimes not attainable. Take Samantha for example – she settles with Smith but soon realises later she desires a life of independence (which we find out in the movies – which I personally don’t recommend and believe the show ends after season 6 – but we can use her ‘movie ending’ as a lesson). Additionally, poor Carrie is left a widow in And Just Like That…, teaching us that sometimes life just isn’t fair.
For me, and I’m sure I speak for many others, when I say there is something about the show that ignites a real sense of warmth and comfort. It simply speaks to our generation. Most of the relationship and dating-centred issues explored on the show us women we can relate to today. It is a timeless show that speaks to female generations and teaches us that we need to learn how to love ourselves before we can begin to love another person.
The show encourages us to slow down in the modern world. It teaches us to stop indulging in ‘the rush’ of life and the desperate need to settle down at a ‘socially acceptable’ age. Instead, enjoy the journey and live in the moment, and most importantly, have fun, go to a bar with your gal pals, go to that club, go on holiday with that man, even change your career. In an age where societal pressures seem to be coming from all directions and seem to consume us, Sex And The City teaches us that it is okay to not have it all figured out or ‘to have it all.’ The journey, whilst being chaotic and difficult at times, certainly has its rewards at the end. Don’t strive for immediate answers and gratification; good things come to those who wait and live the experience. Enjoy the chaos.
LIFE’S OPTIONS ARE VIBRANT AND ENDLESS
Sex And The City teaches us that life’s options are vibrant and endless. Everybody’s idea of their own ‘happy ending’ differs and is subjective; there is no right answer. You can be a Charlotte and have the perfect Park Avenue apartment, the kindest husband and two beautiful children, or you can be a Miranda, a high-flying lawyer with a loving family, or you can even be a Samantha, an independent and sexual woman who has a successful career in Public Relations, OR you can be none of these! The show allows us to expand our mindset and shows us that nothing is fixed in life, in terms of relationships or even on a general note. And most importantly, it teaches us that navigating life and having fun with your friends has no end.
Iona Parsons
Feature image courtesy of Luca Bravo on Unsplash. Image license found here. No changes were made to this image.
In article image 1 courtesy of Francesca Saraco on Unsplash. Image license found here. No changes were made to this image.
In article image 2 courtesy of Alex Voulgaris on Unsplash. Image license found here. No changes were made to this image.
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