Dear Auntie Carol…
How do I make sure I have someone waiting under the mistletoe?
First things first, you do not NEED anyone waiting under the mistletoe. When our Messiah Carey famously said, ‘All I Want For Christmas Is You’, she was singing about herself! That’s right: Carey’s Christmas bop is actually an anthem of self-love. She told me herself.
BUT, if you are feeling a bit Santa-mental, or just a bit of a mistlehoe, here are my tips for this cuffing season!
- Believe in your elf!
There is NOTHING more attractive than elf-confidence! It’s far too cold to be chasing anyone at this time of year (or any time of year). So, the best way to get someone under the mistletoe with you is to snow off! Shoulders BACK, party outfit ON, and let the rest take care of itself.
- It’s the most Tinder-ful time of the year!
“Choose your poison: Tinder, Grindr, Bumble #ad x3. Let it swipe, let it swipe, let it swipe”
Whatever your opinions on dating apps, they are a foolproof way to get a snog this season. It’s winter – everyone’s desperate! Choose your poison: Tinder, Grindr, Bumble #ad x3. Let it swipe, let it swipe, let it swipe. You’ll have matches in snow time, fir sure!
- Make a scene
If the first two steps fail, you need attention ASAP. You need all eyes on you in the centre of the ring, just like a circus. You need to be a rebel without a Claus. Whether it’s a smashed glass, a solo game of charades, or an impromptu performance of ‘All The Jingle Ladies’ – show everyone what they’re missing!
Good luck on your mistletoe rendezvous. And remember, if all else fails, it’s also the most wine-derful time of the year!
Alexa, play ‘Mistletoe’.
Keep me in a job Carolers – ask me a question here!