Dear Agony Aunt: I’m losing self-confidence…

Dear Auntie Carol…

What do you think is a good way to boost self-confidence?

Auntie Carol says…

You might be surprised to hear this but Auntie Carol wasn’t always this confident! Once I was a very quiet, very SHY girl. I was!

My main problem was overthinking – I’d make certain situations seem SO big in my head until I was just a bag of nerves. The only solution I found was to stop thinking! Poppers don’t work!

Turn your brain OFF, put your headphones IN, turn your music ON! Just get on with it!

Here’s the songs that I listen to when I need to stop overthinking and be THAT bitch:

 1. ‘no tears left to cry’ – Ariana Grande

Let’s be real, you probably do still have some tears left to cry! That’s why you’re here! Just listen to Ari – it makes everything better.

2. ‘Get Outta My Way’ – Kylie

The Australian princess of pop urges us girls not to settle for men who aren’t worth their time.

3. ‘Immaterial’ – SOPHIE

Trans producer SOPHIE’s song is a message of reclaiming your identity: “I could be anything I want… Anyhow, anywhere, any place, anyone that I want”.

4. ‘When I Rule the World’ – LIZ

It is IMPOSSIBLE to listen to this SOPHIE-produced song without feeling a little spunky.


5. ‘Girl Gone Wild’ – Madonna

This song isn’t about Madge’s fall at the Brits – it’s a BOP of female empowerment and sexual liberation.

6. ‘Hands on Me’ – Ariana Grande

Can you tell I like Ariana Grande? She can do no wrong. ESPECIALLY with this sexy, sexy song.

7. ‘Sissy That Walk’ – RuPaul

“Pick myself up, turn the world on its head”. IF I ever die, play this song at my funeral so I can sissy into the afterlife.

8. ‘Don’t Panic’ – Years and Years

We should ALL look up to Olly Alexander – SUCH a lovely young man, with a lovely smile and a lovely message.

9. ‘Good as Hell’ – Lizzo

Toss your hair, check your nails, and give yourself that self-love you deserve.

10. ‘Woman’s World’ – Cher

Cher’s newspaper wig in this music video is a lesson in self-confidence to us all.


You might not understand the lyrics to this K-Pop song but TRUST me it’ll get you doing the bass face (you know what I’m talking about).

12. ‘I Don’t Need A Man’ – The Pussycat Dolls

Remember – you don’t! Nobody does!

Alexa, play Carol’s Spotify.

Therapists are expensive but Carol is free – ask me a question here!

Auntie Carol

Featured image courtesy of Gavin Whitner. Image license found here.

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