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Dear Agony Aunt: I don’t know how to cure my hangover…

Dear Auntie Carol…

How do you get over a hangover?

Dear reader…

“I’m not going to tell you that you should’ve drunk water or eaten bread before going to sleep – that’s your mum’s speech. I’m the cool Auntie, remember?”

Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell you that you should’ve drunk water or eaten bread before going to sleep – that’s your mum’s speech. I’m the cool Auntie, remember? What matters now is that you were a MESS last night and now you’re paying the price with a hangover from hell. There are different types of hangovers – you could have the Jäger shakes, the vodka eyes, or the wine headache.

It doesn’t matter which one you have, what matters NOW is self-love, self-respect and self-care (three things you probably didn’t have last night!)

  1. Grease Lightning

There’s not much that can beat a big, greasy breakfast the morning after drinking. I’ve lost count of how many times me and my girls have strutted down the Wetherspoons #ad for a veggie breakfast – if you go veggie, you get an EXTRA (veggie) sausage and no bacon! Bacon is cancelled for 2019; positive vibes only, no saltiness. AND, Spoons do bottomless coffee so the coffee warriors can go HAM against the hangover goons in your bloodstream! I think that’s the scientific explanation – I am AUNTIE Carol, not BSc Carol.

  1. Fresh air

Be at one with nature. Go and catch up with your gal pal, Mother Nature. Breath in something that isn’t poppers. This point is like having a bath as a kid – you won’t want to do it but once you ARE doing it, you’ll be thankful.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not telling you to go all Bear Grylls! If you have a dog – walk it. If you don’t have a dog – pretend.

Walk to the shop – buy more booze. WHICH leads me on to my next point (nice link, right?)

  1. Hair of the dog

You can’t be hungover if you’re always drunk! You heard me! It’s CHRISTMAS! There is NOTHING stopping you from drinking 24/7 and never having a hangover! Coursework? Revision? Jobs? NO! Did I stutter? Don’t let anything stop you from enjoying yourself at Christmas.

If you think this is encouraging irresponsible drinking, well then you’re wrong – I’m encouraging a Good Time. And, this is an anonymous column, so I don’t know WHO you think you’re going to complain about.

Alexa, play ‘Cheers (Drink to That)’

Let me give out more pearls of wisdom – ask me a question here!

Auntie Carol

Featured image courtesy of Jörg Schubert via Flickr. Image license found here.

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